How to accept your reality when ‘real’ seems so unreal?
But it makes sense, that if the immune system is busy, they don’t care much about repairing the muscles.
It’s not that easy tho. I wish it was. Because of course, I care about getting smoked every Sunday at the moment. And of course, I’m scared that people think I’m weak or I’m giving up. But the truth is, that when I’m out there racing my absolute best, while the leaders still are more than 10 minutes ahead of me, it's so difficult. It takes so much courage, bravery and will from me to finish the race. And afterwards to see all the small positive notes. It takes tears and bad nights, but I do it, and I have actually been pretty positive througthout this whole thing, that can’t be weakness. Riding my best while not caring about what others might think of this slow version of Malene, can’t be weakness.
I hope this unreal feeling of my reality will be over soon.
In my last post, after Les Gets, I said I wanted to make the upcoming weekends a staircase. Lenzerheide is step 3. I cross my fingers that it will be another step in the rigth direction. I feel it's me against the clock, season 19' is soon to be over.
And fyi I havn't accepted a slow Malene
Reflect what you desire, become what you respect