I couldn’t help but wonder… In a world obsessed with 'The fastest', why don’t we talk more about 'The forever'? Could it be that the ultimate luxury is the ability to stay in cycling as your body, circumstances and priorities change? 

My entire teen and adult life has been about the polar opposite: speed. 
Could I do it? Could I slow down?
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Turns out: I could (with a couple of mental breakdowns? yes. Haha, sorry Nino). 
I have been on my bike, both MTB and road, but mainly I have tried to stay relaxed. 

I couldn’t help but wonder… (in true Carrie Bradshaw style), when a woman becomes a mother, does she lose her competitive edge, or does it simply evolve into something more efficient? 
I mean, there must be some remaining super-hero extra blood volume in there - or maybe it’s just the heart growing bigger in more ways than one. 

Lately, life has found a new rhythm, turning around feeds and sleep(s). It has been, and is, lovely to explore this new rhythm of life while also managing to fit it into my life of bikes and travel. 
My gravel bike has been looking at me from the garage, with what feels like longing eyes, so I have decided to sign up for a Gravel Race. The GRIT N’ GRIND, in Sweden, in August. That’s approximately 4 months from now. 150km of Swedish gravel. At the moment, my riding time is so limited, but I plan to slowly build it up, so I feel ready and capable on that summer day in August. Maybe something is going to come up before, who knows, but at least now I have a goal. 

They say that after a baby, your priorities shift. And they are right, they do. But I’ve found that my legs still remember the feeling of a climb, and my heart still beats for a race start. I’m 4 months out from Grit n’ grind, so let’s find out what this 'Mum Strength’ is. Just a fancy term for 'I have 30 minutes to train, and I’m going to make every second count’? Or is 150km a walk in the park after birth and sleep deprivation? Only one way to find out! 
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​/M

​I became someone’s mother last December. It’s the most beautiful thing, it’s exhausting, it´s overwhelming love, and it’s all-consuming.
​For the past months, my social media has been kind of just a collection of little rectangular photos from my camera roll, that I snapped here and there, without much text. But in reality, I have had so many more thoughts, feelings and challenges that I just haven’t shared. 

​Now spring is arriving, and I feel it. I want to start the new season by opening up more, more about motherhood and my experience in this new chapter of my life. 

​I want to start with challenging the idea of what a mum should do or be. One of the reasons I have held back a bit and kept things somewhat ‘polished’ was because, when I first started to post a bit after giving birth, people started to message me, ofc many lovely texts, but also some quite pointy ones – pointing out that I “shouldn’t think about riding but focus on my baby”. When I said I only had time for very short rides – “Welcome to real life!”, “Why do you care about that? You are a mum now”. 
It made me somewhat insecure. But also frustrated. Am I only allowed to be a mum now and stop doing anything for myself? And will that be the only thing that defines me? 

​I plan to come back to do some fun racing events later in the year, but for now, training is like a self-care moment for me. When he naps, I can quickly jump on the home trainer and feel my heart pumping. Or when Nino’s not riding, it’s my turn to take the MTB out for a quick trail ride or run.  I don’t care that I’m slow or weak right now, because I just gave birth to a tiny human and I’m keeping him fed and happy, which feels like the biggest privilege and job I’ve ever had.
​(side note. ps. For anyone who has tried to give birth, what in the world was that, haha, the most primal experience I have ever had. Our bodies just take over, zero control, just instinct!) 

Life changes. Our bodies change. We change. But the bike can remain as a constant. It’s a tool for sanity, fun, friendship, challenges, and a way to remember who we are besides our titles. I want to connect with you in all the messy and beautiful corners of life. Whether you're navigating motherhood, a career shift, just trying to find an hour for yourself, or something else entirely – let’s ride through it together (okay, that sounded cheesy, but you get it). 
 
Cheers to AND’s and changes. 
/Malene