Back to square one

I’m written this blog from my home in Denmark, on a Thursday in the end of March, under normal circumstances this would probably be a post-race blog from my experiences between the tape. But this is very much not normal circumstances. ​

Where to start? I haven’t been sure about what I wanted to write and how to write it, in the right way. Because suddenly my little sport world seemed so insignificant. And to be clear - right now it is. But on the other hand, this is my blog, this is my thoughts, my little world. So without negleting the health crisis we are facing right now, I think it’s okay to address how it feels from a perspective of an Olympic chaser? ​

I told them it felt like a Ludo game. My game was going super well, the little red token had almost cleared all the squares on the way and was just waiting for the final turn before entering the ‘house’ (aka. olympics).

So much has happened over the past weeks, that my brain has been under a serious overload. It has been filled with uncertainty. And one thing, that can make our brain go nuts, is when we can’t predict what will happen next.
I have had sometime to swallow the disappointments of cancelled races, events, camps etc. and yesterday the big O. Every day on the bike for the past many months I have been thinking about the Olympics, how to get there and how to ride my fastest there.

Now that goal is gone.
​Or that’s not entirely true. It’s just on hold.
Seeing it with the positive eyes, it’s one more year to get better, stronger and faster. Seeing it with less posit.. no wait. Let’s not even go there. Because you know what? This was out of my control. And if I know something important about sport, it’s to control what you can and let the rest to itself.

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It’s hard to put the right words to describe the feeling, but yesterday when I tried to explain my parents, I told them it felt like a Ludo game. My game was going super well, the little red token had almost cleared all the squares on the way and was just waiting for the final turn before entering the ‘house’ (aka. olympics). And then out of nowhere one of the other players (corona) hits my token and sends me all they way back to my yard, in the game. Got damn it! You almost smelled the ‘house’ and suddenly you are back to square one. ​

It might sound silly, but it’s the true feeling. It’s frustrating, awfully unlucky, but it’s a part of the game, and there is nothing else to do than keep rolling the die and work your way back towards the ‘house’ again. ​

So that’s what I try to do. Because one thing is for sure, you will never get there if you give up now.

/Malene

there is nothing else to do than keep rolling the die and work your way back towards the ‘house’ again. ​​