Frustrating Racing

I know that it’s important to see things in the bigger picture and let the failures lead your way to success.
I know.

All photo's by Keno Derleyn

Debrief

“Failure is success in progress - Albert Einstein”. So many smart quotes on this topic but when you feel the frustration of a flop, it’s hard to be smart.
It’s Saturday today, 6 days since I raced in Marseille. A French HC race, a high-level race, where there is no space for mistakes and bad decisions. I wasn’t quite satisfied with my racing. As soon as I got my breath back after the finish line I wanted to do all over again. Get a second chance (Wish I could unrace youuuu' >.<).  I made mistakes and I wasn't smart in my racing. I knew it as it happened, but turning a bad start around requires more from you than just good legs. ​

In order to see progress, and learn from your mistakes you need to address them and see if you can change something for next time (aka. Let the smart part of our brains do the math). So in the debriefing on a race, I talk with my coach and my inner circle. We look at numbers, power, heart-rate, result and then we talk about my feelings around and doing the race. After Sunday's race we quickly got to the conclusion that I need to remember to keep calm and stay cool while racing, trust my power and skills. In other words; don’t let small mistake take too much control over my riding nor let uncontrollable factors affect you. (I had my period over the weekend - I wanna write about this one day!). We’re on the right way and we just need to trust the work and stay focused for the last preparation’s towards the world cup opener.

Self-talk

The focus started with a rest week. Resetting and recharging the Malene-Battery.
That sounds all well-balanced and thought through. And it is. But there is still this small little mean voice in me being like; ‘Really Malene? That was not a good race from you - You really think you got this?’. My first answer is always the insecure Malene ‘mm.. maybe.. maybe not? ah.. goddammit I don’t know’, then comes my smarter part saying that; 'I need to calm the F*** down and trust what I’m doing, failure is a part of the game’. ​

No matter what discussions I have with myself, I can’t deny that I feel frustrated about the race and that I want to turn the negative feeling's into positive motivation for the next month of training. So I can make everyday count. Get better and so on.
​Heading into a rest week just after a frustrating race 

hasn’t been easy, no 'bike-mindfulness' for me. However, I think, that the fact, that I have had more time to actually think about the race - or more importantly I have had time to feel how I actually am, will come in handy when I start the final build-up to what’s going to be one exciting World Cup season! ​​

#unmotivatedMonday

After a bad race, I always need some time to rethink things a little. I need to find that inner motivation to really do everything I can to get better, and I need to use the bad day and turn into something good. And I will. I just need time. And that's okay. No #mondaymotivation for me after a Sunday like that. But now a new week is around the corner and I feel the Orbea-Oiz looking at me with longing eyes. So I should give it some company and go enjoy getting stronger.

Hugs
Malene   ​