Stories

To be resilient

7/6/2019

Try to be resilient Malene. No, I have to be resilient.
Being resilient is defined by the ability withstand or recover quick from a difficult condition.
Be resilient Malene.

When you see things in the greater perspective, then 10 days off-schedule doesn’t seem too bad. But when you are living in those 10 days it can be pretty bad.

10 days before World Cup number 3 took off was a recovery day for me. I came spinning down a gravel road, it was 35 degrees and I was a bit tired. Training had been going really well since our National Championship, so there was an earned tiredness in my body. In front of me, I saw someone was working in the field and there were cars moving around. I remember looking at them and the next thing I feel is just the ruthless gravel road against my skin.

I had hit a hole in the gravel road, in that 1 second, I was looking away. One-second of paying attention to something else and then boom. It took me a little while to get up and get myself together. All the worst fears were ruining through my mind at that moment - how hurt am I? It definitely hurts, but? It was bleeding a lot from my elbow and I removed a rock from it. That didn’t really stop the bleeding… so I called Loic and told him to find me. “I’m on the gravel road close to the city…” Good luck Loic.
He found me, I got cleaned up and at the hospital, they stitched my elbow together.

Setbacks always give perspectives.

Recovery

I'm 22 now and I still turn 12 when I have to call my mor (mom) and tell her that I'm hurt. Like when I talk with the doctor I can keep it cool; 'yea, bit painful, can't really move but it's okay'. Then I hear my mum's voice and I'm just cracking like, 'mooaaar it's horrible, I'm so not okay'.
Wondering if I will ever grow too old for that, hah.

Anyways. The skin missing wasn't really a 'big' deal, even tho it was a big area and it did bring pain, the skin repair itself quite fast (the human body is pretty amazing). 7 days after this picture was taken I only had some light pink marks left. (I kept it 'wet' the whole time under covers, and it worked super well).
The elbow.. Was a bigger deal. An inflammation came doing the first 24 hours and I started on Antibiotics. It didn't evolve well, and I had no strength. So after 3 days, I got prescripted a new antibiotic with a bigger spectrum (=kills more enemies in the body). That was a game changer and my elbow started to get a normal colour, temperature and form. Halleluja.

Getting back to training

After 5 days laying on the sofa, it was time to feel the body on the bike again. I wasn't sick anymore - I don't know why but while my body was working on the infection it made me feel sick, so I stayed on that sofa, hah, maybe it knows me?
The short spin was so unpleasant. I had looked much forward for this moment and then it turned out to be so disappointing. Crap.
I called my team-manager and told him about my sensations on the bike. He gave me the idea to check the hr every morning to follow the response of my road back to training.
After a few days of short rides, my body started to feel normal again.

What a good feeling. Setbacks always give perspectives.
8 days post crashing, the only thing that hold me back and still does is the weakness of my elbow. Training on the tarmac is not a problem, but a little speed bump or something alike feel like a shock in the elbow.

The antibiotic definitely has an impact on my body and I am really cautious about everything I am doing. My training load, recovery, mood, food, hydration and so on. Trying to be honest with myself. How are you today Malene?
If I want to be resilient in this situation, I have to roll back the super-hero-I-can-do-everything feeling, I think.

Decision making

I do have that feeling, if you wonder. It's my 'I'm-a-strong-iiindeeeepeeendent-woman' feeling, haha. It comes in handy most of the time, but I can also shoot myself in the foot at times. So Malene, take it easy.
Easy to say - hard to do.

When I first crashed I didn't even think about missing the WC. I was just focused on healing as fast as possible.
But as the days went by I had to admit that I couldn't possible ride a World Cup when I couldn't even ride on tarmac without a lot of caution and pain.

One thing is to call the team and tell it. But another thing is to say it out loud and admit to yourself.

It might sound silly, but it's a little heartbreaking. I was so excited to ride in the colour of the danish flag on the awesome track in Andorra.
Not this year anyway.

Health over any race, always.

Moving forward

With the antibiotic 10-day cure coming to an end my body is feeling stronger and more capable of doing what I could prior the crash.
So with all the small positive notes and progresses I am looking forward to travel to Les Gets for next weekend. I really hope I will be ready for it. At least I'm doing my best at staying calm, train smart and being resilient.

If I want to be resilient in this situation, I have to roll back the super-hero-I-can-do-everything feeling, I think.

/Malene

Thanks for reading and supporting me, even in the bad times.

P.s my Boyfriend Loic just won the DH world cup in Andorra today. This made my weekend, just wow.

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Danish National Championship 2019

6/18/2019

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Do something today that your future self will thank you for.

That was my mindset for the Danish National Championship 2019.

A strong mantra to your mind doesn't come out of nothing so let me take you three weeks back.

To be honest with you guys. Coming home from two so successful World Cup weeks wasn’t as glorious as it may sound. The three past weeks leading up to our nationals was actually far from what I excepted it would be.
The evening after my first world cup podium was spent with a good Danish crew on a small restaurant in Prag, followed by a single room airport hotel where I would be waiting for my flight to Copenhagen the next morning. The hotel room was cold and quiet. It was exactly the celebration I needed, as stupid as it sounds. But after 2 intense weeks with world cup racing and people around me all the time, it felt so good to sneak under the sheets, close my eyes and just go through the day in my own little bubble before I drift off to sleep.
The problem came when reality hit me Monday morning

and I hadn’t left the sleepy bubble yet.
Actually, it took me a whole week before I really left this strange state of mind. I told my coach that I didn’t want a strict plan for the week or any plan, just hours on the bike with my friends. So that was what I did. Anyway, it was actually with the local mtb club, my love for the sport started in the first place - so why don’t come back here from time to time?
I got kicked out (literally) of my bubble when I got my butt kicked in a c1 race in Denmark, the following Sunday. On Monday (now 2 weeks before nationals) I woke up with new motivation and I felt the fire to perform again. Sometimes failure is just what you need. The drive was back - so I gave ‘green light’ to the coach and he built up a two-week block of training. It looked hard, and it made me a little scared, but I ret somewhere that if it makes you feel a little uncomfortable you are in the right place.

I called it 'loosing focus', he said it was a sign of a healthy human.

And oh yes it made me feel uncomfortable. I went into every training with this drive, but I struggled. The intention was there, but I couldn’t really put it together. So I just went with the flow and let my ‘what I want’ rank higher than ‘what I should’.

So when the weekend of nationals was upon us, I wasn’t the most confident Malene around. I knew the past 3 weeks hadn’t been optimal performance-wise for this race, but on the other hand, I wouldn’t change it. I talked quite a bit about it with my boyfriend. He said it was a good thing that I was able to 'pull the plug' sometimes. I called it 'loosing focus', he said it was a sign of a healthy human. And that the ability to listen to the body and not push anything through just because you feel a ‘I have to’, is a good thing. We went on the track for practice, found the lines and tried to make me the fastest Malene possible.

When Sunday came I had my crew around me. Loic on track to encourage me and give me splits, mum in feed zone 1 and Theo (mechanic) in feed zone 2. I knew this was a big opportunity for me to win that red and white jersey. 2019 had so far been my strongest year, the track suited me well and the bike was working perfectly. Annika Langvad was unfortunately out with injury, so it was the battle of the young guns - Caroline Bohe and myself.

But that Sunday I could handle the pain, because I wanted to do something today that my future self would thank me for.

We started and I actually didn’t feel amazing. The past three weeks were stocked in my mind, but I wanted that win, so I knew that I would be able to suffer a lot today, I wanted that win so bad. When a gap opened up between Caroline and me, I just went as hard as I could. I attacked with 2,5 lap to go so the last half-hour was just one big suffer fest. But that Sunday I could handle the pain, because I wanted to do something today that my future self would thank me for.

As I’m writing this, I’m flying back to my apartment in the South and I’m looking much forward continue to build on this momentum. Focus is on building on my fitness and feel the confidence come back, towards World Cup no. 3. Let’s go!

I got asked quite a lot about what I’m thinking about the rest of the season, now when it all started so well. And for real... I just wanna take it one step at the time. Starting with designing a red and white kit :-) “You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step” (Martin Luther King Jr).

/Malene

p.s Thanks for all the support. You guys mean a lot.

P.s.s. Don’t take my sleepy bubble for something negative. I was (and am) really happy and proud of my results in the World Cup, but there are two things to it (I think); first of all, it feels strange when you achieve something you almost didn’t dare to dream of. Secondly, when people ask me if I aren’t just super happy now, yes I’m happy, but I’m not happier if I podium in a world cup than any other day - I want my basic happiness to be based on something else than something as unpredictable as bike-racing results :-) (Not to dismiss that success-feeling is absolutely amazing, no doubts)

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Surprisingly surprised

5/28/2019

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“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take” quote. So go take it Malene.

Before the World Cup I wrote; “I’m so lucky I get to race side by side with the fastest women in my sport, I only got 7 chances to do it this year so I better enjoy it”. So off I went to the two first World Cup events. Lots of questions had been summing around in my head over the past 5 months. How is it to race in the elite category? The starts? The short track? The level? The pressure? It felt so good to finally stand on the start line. It’s been a long time coming.

But I felt calm and prepared. Excited, not nervous, I knew I had done my homework 100% as I wanted to. I was fully prepared to race xco, but as you know the World Cup format includes a Short Track Friday evening. I haven't spent much time thinking nor planning for this event, it’s a completely new challenge for me so I had decided to play it safe and try to just finish top 24. So I did. I stayed near the top 20 for all 20 minutes and just observed (finished 21).

Success is just an awesome feeling. The feeling is worth all the work.

When Sunday came it was finally time to ride the xco race. Albstadt is a short lap but with lots of climbing meters. On a track like that, it’s very easy to destroy yourself. Therefore I kept my start position around 20 for the first lap, again like in the xcc I tried to observe the other rides and not hesitate. My legs kept on riding well and halfway through the race I felt the engine inside of me still was full of gas, so I just kept on pushing. Through all 90 minutes, I climbed slowly but surely further towards the front. On the last lap, I knew I was fighting for a top 10 result, to reach that I had to go all out on the

last switchbacks climb.
My team and Loic was encouraging me from the sideline, so I just pushed with all I got in the pedals and secured my first top 10 WC result. What a day. What a dreamy entrance to the elite world cup scene! It felt so good to cross the finish line and get big hugs from the team around me. I was quite emotional. I dreamed about a top 10 result, but to do it in the first try was just an incredible feeling. Success is just an awesome feeling. The feeling is worth all the work.

On Monday I was still buzzing from the race, a hangover, but a good one. There wasn’t much time to celebrate tho, because we were onwards to Nove Mesto na Morave - World Cup no. 2. The week with the team was pretty cool and we lived in a big house together - which is a good way to get to know each other better, instead of being in a hotel. So thanks to my team for doing this for us riders for the first world cup trip.

The race-weekend came quick and suddenly I was standing on the start line again. How could I do better when I had such a perfect race in Albstadt? I talked with my coach and we decided to stay with the same plan. Just get Malene from A to B as fast as possible. Last weekend 'that' was enough for a ten place. If 20 girls are faster than the fastest Malene is, in Nove Mesto, then so be it. I just had to be the best version of athlete Malene out there.

But there is a difference between knowing you can do something and actually do it.

And off we went. My second xco world cup race with the elite women. On the start loop, I worked my way up through the pack and when we started the 1st real lap I came around as 9th in a little group. Anne Tauber and Jolanda Neff started out like fire and made a little gap down to the rest, fast. I tried to race like in Albstadt, just riding in my zone and using my power as smart as possible. As the race developed I found myself a contender to the 7th spot. Wow, this could be amazing. So when the last lap came I knew exactly where I wanted to attack Linda Indergand and Anne Terpstra. On the first technical climb. I attacked and it worked out, even tho Linda was not far away. When the second climb arrived I kept pushing as hard as I could and suddenly I saw Jolanda struggle with a flat.

I passed her and then I heard my team manager yell that 5th was in reach - I just had to gooo! No time to think about the podium, focus on my riding, I had a plan - remember? I came safely down the technical descends and felt the acid fill my body ones more as we climbed the last real climb. Who wants to sprint against Linda? Not me! After losing two sprints in Nove Mesto (thanks to Sina haha) I was giving my absolute everything to keep the gap between us. I was now in 6th position and as I went up the last rooty climb I saw Tauber struggling with her gears. The fire inside of me was insane. A mix of acid and adrenalin was fueling it. When I arrived on the finish straight and I saw Linda some meters behind me it was just all or nothing. The next second I crossed the finish line. In 5th position. What the heck just happened.

Surprised? Surprisingly surprised. Last year when I was competing with Sina Frei and Evie Richards in U23, I could see on the lap times that our’s often was inside top 10 in the elite women field, but it’s hard to compare 1:1. Whatsoever I knew inside of me that I was able to compete against the best women, also in the elite field. But there is a difference between knowing you can do something and actually do it. It takes a lot.
But I took the shot and I met my dreams one hundred %.
I don't really believe it, it's just such a dream coming true. I owe many people a huge thank you. Honestly, WOW.

Now I’m back in Denmark - appreciating the last weeks of success and continuing to chase dreams.
Being an underdog is awesome.

/Malene

Here's the TEAM Video :

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